It has been a while.
It has been a very long while.
To be honest and transparent, I’ve been going through a big change.
Last autumn, I sold my house, sold my car and almost everything I owned. When I only had three boxes left of ‘things’, I shipped them to another country and started a new job with a sister company.
This change has been immense to say the least. Immense in good ways, hard ways and of course unexpected ways. The thing is, this change has provided so much fodder for this little space in the interwebz. But I just couldn’t. Yet.
My meditation practice has come and gone through the last 8 months. I’m not here to be the meditation example to aspire to. I’m here to share my journey into meditation, the ups and the downs.
So here I am, up and down with meditation.
There have been times where I have been so.over.whelmed with this change that I have not been able to face my meditation practice. At all.
And when I say I haven’t been able to face my meditation practice, what I mean is that I have not been able to face myself. The feelings that this change has stirred. I just couldn’t sometimes.
While I may not have been able to actually sit down with my legs crossed, my hands on my thighs and my spine perfectly strait with closed eyes actually meditating, I do have to say that my meditation practice has been there in some capacity throughout out everything.
What I realized that the simple awareness that I couldn’t sit down and meditate was what meditation has brought me. I couldn’t address the grip. But I knew the grip was there. And that is a small separation, a small pause which brought small peace.
My meditation practice is here now. I can sit with myself and the grip.
I don’t feel as though I can only share my meditation practice when I’m actually meditating. But this blog is a form of facing meditation. And like I mentioned above, I just couldn’t. Yet. But I’m here now.
My intent is to be transparent and honest. I’m back to do that.
Meditate & be well.